Tag Archives: Gossip

If the Shoe Fits …

“I sure hope Nancy doesn’t forget to bring the cookies for tonight’s rehearsal refreshments.”

Susan knew she was being hateful when she made that comment to her friends who were helping her finish the last minute adjustments to the props for the Christmas program. After all, last summer Nancy had forgotten to provide the post-game drinks for the baseball team. True. Nancy had laughed it off and bought each of the boys a drink at the concession stand. She came through, but Nancy HAD forgotten.

“Surely she will remember. Do you want me to call and remind her?”

Susan bristled a bit as she realized how mean her comment must have sounded, but she wasn’t willing to let it go.

“No. We will just let her suffer the consequences of disappointing the cast if she forgets.” Several members of the group shook their heads. In the spirit of negativism, another couple of critical comments were made about Nancy.

The committee continued their work but mostly in grumbly silence. Earlier there had been a bit of joking and laughing as they worked. Now, each was lost in negative thoughts.

10358549_10152453515292051_1257299025565982829_nThe work was completed. The cookies arrived on time. Nancy wondered why everyone was so testy.

Have you ever noticed how one cynical comment about another person in your group can poison the interactions of all who heard it?

I am ashamed to say that I have been guilty of making such comments. And like the members of the committee, I have been unwilling to do the right thing—make a tactful call so the fretting can stop. How often have I failed to make the effort to turn the conversation to something uplifting and wholesome?

But if you bite and devour one another, watch out that you are not consumed by one another.  Galatians 5:15

If the shoe fits . . .

Resolution Challenge–Day 8 Gossip

imgres 2All of us could write an authoritative paper about how gossip has hurt us. We all have been deeply hurt because of unfair rumors. Gossip, whether we are repeating it or listening to it, is bad, and we know it. Yet we engage in it. Why?

One reason is voyeurism. We like to hear how other people mess up. Viewing into their unseemly private lives makes us feel superior. After all, we would never let ourselves get into that kind of a mess.

Another reason is jealousy. We like to see someone who has higher social standing or authority get knocked down a peg or two.

When we feel bad about ourselves, we talk about others. Somehow we feel better when we portray others as evil or stupid.

Sometimes it is peer pressure. We want to be in the know and everyone is talking about what is going on with their victim. Unfortunately, gossip can be a form of bullying. Even as adults we often lack the courage to stand up to bullies.

Sadly, we make ourselves feel like it is okay to gossip when we put the gossip in the form of a prayer request. We like to show off our insider knowledge and forget that most of the details should not be mentioned. A short, one-sentence request for pray is generally best.

When is gossip most difficult for you to resist?

Whoever covers an offense seeks love, but he who repeats a matter separates close friends.  Proverbs 17:9

Resolved Day 8:  I will not listen to or repeat gossip today.